Slowly, but Surely

It’s been six months since my last entry and things are moving positively in a good direction. Not as quick as I hope, but surely.  What is the saying again? “All in God’s timing?”

Alyssa can now bend to about 105 degrees and can easily do squats and bicycle machine.  I know it seems like such a long time, but we can only hope it will continue to be restored as time goes on.  Her physical therapist just said she should be done with therapy soon, and I ask her “but what about her full mobility” she said Alyssa will have enough to work on her own. So once the surgeon is ok with this decision, I hope she will allow Alyssa to continue personal training at the gym which will give her a chance to increase her flexibility.

Alyssa and I have been at the gym for may 2-3 months now. We are both getting stronger and able to lift heavier weights each time.  As for me, I am not on a drastic diet but I feel a bit better.  I have to thank God for the job to get me up each day and have a purpose.  I just am not in a place to start a drastic diet yet. Been there, done that, know what it requires. So again….slowly but surely.  My goal is to be strong enough and motivated enough to start up the SoulCore certification that I got back in 2018.  If God wills it, this will bring me even more energy and purpose to life. 

My job is going well. I feel proud that one of projects I managed is near completion and now I am given a few more responsibilities so I am at a good place now with meeting a work-balance.  I always want to make a difference, so if it is toward the end of my career that I see output of my work, so be it.  All in God’s hands and all in God’s plan.

Since it will be another six months or so until I jump on this blogger again, I wish you all a Happy Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I am looking forward to spending the Holidays with family in Canada.  Not looking forward to the cold though.  But who’s complaining?

An Update Since September 2020

 It's been too long since I've updated my blog.  This year has gone by so fast.  It's now been nine months since Alyssa completed chemotherapy.  She's also still doing physical therapy although now she goes only once a week.  She's able to bend her leg to about 85 degrees but still cannot bend it all the way and this is a  year after her first surgery has taken place.  The therapist doesn't force her leg to bend anymore, but does different functional exercises to get her moving.

She goes for her third leg surgery on Thursday.  The screws that were part of the original surgery had come lose and they need to install a plate as they are unable to remove the screws.  Her second follow-up leg surgery was to remove the other screws attached to her growth plate in her leg and to add more bone graft to facilitate healing.  Still her leg is not healing as it should so they will be adding more bone graft on Thursday.

How is Alyssa feeling? She's not nervous, this will be her seventh surgery since her cancer journey started.  1) When she biopsy done to confirm she had cancer 2) Port installed for chemo treatment 3) appendix removed as it became inflamed 4) major surgery to remove cancer tumor in her femur and add cadaver bone and her own fibula bone 5) follow-up surgery to remove screws in her leg 6) removing port after cancer treatment.  And finally this one.  

She's a trooper that's for sure, and she's managed to maintain A average on her report card.  Only one term she got a "B."  She works hard and stays positive; even makes time to do ab workouts.  I'm proud of her.

Mother's Day was a great celebration.  Alyssa filled out a "mom and me" journal I bought from Target in 2019. It's good to see how she responds to questions in the journal that we both can relate to. She also got me a care basket and we, as a family, went to Pho (my favorite noodle soup place) for dinner.

As for me, I'm doing OK.  I've been teleworking now for 3 months and it's going OK.  Not so busy, but get to work on a high visibility project.  I'm still waiting to hear on my security clearance -- it was pulled in October which limits my ability to bid on assignments.  I don't know the reason for it, but I hope it gets reinstated soon.  It was mostly related to my panic attack when I was in DC and had to be hospitalized (voluntarily).  

Well, I'm just glad that Alyssa has been cancer free, her hair is growing and she's gaining weight.  We just hope she continues to grow on schedule.  

One month Post Chemo

Well, one month and a few days past Alyssa’s last chemo. She also had her 3 month CT and MRI scans and she is all clear!  Still, her port has to remain in for a few more months as advised by her doctor’s just in case. Yesterday we went to the doctor’s office to do a port flush to make sure it doesn’t clog or stop working during inactivity.

She is doing overall fine. She is keeping up with her classes via Zoom without having to work with the coach offered by the school. Everyday at lunch, she chats with her friend from school and sees her on weekends. Life is somewhat normalizing although she is not done.

Physical therapy began a couple of weeks ago and she is doing well. Sometimes the therapist works her to the point of crying, but she is a trooper. Now we wait to see the surgeon to remove the screws from her growth plate and she is also now using a device to help her bone heal. If it doesn’t heal properly they may need to add bone graft to the top. The bottom portion seems to be healing fine so that is good news.  Alyssa is now using crutches instead of a walker to get her left leg used to more weight.  We still have ways to go before she can run. Just glad she is on the road to recovery, along with the ongoing appointments needed.

As for mom, I am doing well. Keeping busy with cooking during the work week while Jason works. I am becoming an amateur cook after trying out all these casserole dishes my cousin sent me. When a recipe tells me 10 min prep it’s usually 20 for me, LoL. But I am getting better and learning not to overcook chicken!! I went to see a doctor and he says that I need to take iron again - it appears I am anemic. Otherwise I am healthy and need to lower my sugar levels. I am not diabetic but my mom had diabetes type 2 so I need to be careful. 

Until next time... Thank you all for reading and for your prayers. Once this pandemic is over, I look forward to getting together for a cup of wine or so!!!

Last Week of Chemo

Well, we have finally reached our final week of chemo. What a long journey this has been since the start of it, December 20.  We are going to miss all the staff in the hospital, the wonderful nurses, the massage therapist, the art therapist, the physical therapist and even a yoga teacher who came in and offered me lessons. Alyssa wasn’t into music but we even got a visit from the musician who played the guitar. It is a nice little community here. And to top that, the child life specialist drops by with goodies for Alyssa each time. They get a lot of toy donations so it’s been raining arts and crafts, toys, puzzles and LEGO’s and whatnot.

It’s been nice, but Alyssa will be glad not to have the smell of the hospital anytime soon. This is a huge accomplishment for her to stick it through to the end.

School starts the following week, and it will be busy for her but it is a relief knowing she will resume a somewhat normal life again. Soon to be gone are the 12-hour days of sleep and hours of playing Fortnite with Dad, nonstop. 

I have tracked a list of side effects from chemo and just so glad that things will normalize up. Alyssa will start eating more once her appetite returns, her hair will grow back, she won’t be neutropenic anymore meaning she won’t have food restrictions such eating only low-bacteria foods. Her body will heal quicker too, with chemo out of the way.

We are proud of our little girl’s courage and strength and look forward to putting this behind her, as the year she will never forget. 

Week 25

Well, here we are approaching the last leg of chemo therapy. Next week two outpatient visits, then 1 week break, then the last two back to back week chemos....yay!! Still not out of the woods by any means, as the side effects (especially with appetite issues) will linger after chemo is done.  I am glad to build a network where I can ask questions and know what to expect.

I am happy and ready to move forward. I am on leave without pay from work until next April but I must begin looking for my next work assignment, April 2021. Fortunately 6-year rule of working stateside max for the State Department has increased to 8 years so I can try for an assignment in Florida again since I have worked in the US 5 years since returning from Baghdad in 2015. This means I need to lobby soon and if it’s not FL this time around, I may have to separate again from my family. I don’t want to, it has caused emotional turmoil for me and a distancing with my daughter.  As I say before, they don’t pay the big bucks for nothing.

Alyssa is doing fine.  She still has issues from chemo side effects but we are doing our best to manage it. Her blood pressure is normal again.  If my calculations are correct, a fever is due week 27, and she is back in the hospital with those darn covid nose swab tests again for EACH hospital inpatient admission. I have heard babies cry but even a grownup has cried. Yeah, imagine having someone push a stick up your nose. Each time she cries, and each time it gets worse when the nurses try and she delays it up to 3-5 min before she is ready.

I am just glad this will be over. I am looking forward to when she is no longer immunocompromised. I see pictures of ppl’s Instagram and Facebook vacay pics to the outdoors, pool parties, just getting out and one wonders....are we in the middle of a pandemic or what?! I wish I can get out soon with my family too. Hanging in there.

I’ll be back at the end to post soon. I know I used to be super active in posting to Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and what not. But I am slowly but surely returning to my normal self.  I am beginning to realize how I fell into this deep dark pit and now I am ready to pull myself out ....real soon.

Til next time. Thank you for praying for us. 🙏🏻😊❤️

Week 22

It is now week 22 of Alyssa’s chemotherapy adventure since this all started December 20. This week she is home with two outpatient visits of chemo and next week she is off. The side effects these last two weeks have been the high blood pressure, which we can only assume resulted from meds and IV fluids. She is now taking medication for that. Every week, something new resulting from chemo.

Good news, her chest X-rays and femur MRI came clear. The cancer has not spread to her lungs, thank goodness. We asked for a bone scan which is full body she will get next week. Just to be sure. Thank you everyone for your continued prayers.

I joined Gilda’a club, oncology support group for those impacted by cancer. So far I met one lady who’s 20-year-old daughter just finished chemo for osteosarcoma and I am glad I got to share concerns with side effects her daughter experienced similar pains resulting from chemo.  I was concerned about Alyssa’s nutrition and weight loss and she reassured me her daughter went through the same, as long as we get some food in there somehow and to always give her what she asked to eat.  

There is a new 11-year-old girl diagnosed with osteosarcoma who also lives in Shenandoah, our neighborhood. We hope the family will want to connect with us, this would be good for Alyssa to mentor and share with a girl close to her age.  Having the support during cancer treatment is so important.

As for me, I am hanging in there as usual. Trying to take it day by day.  They say taking care of yourself is important for caregivers so I have to make sure I do what I can - prayer, exercise and eating better.  I used to do so much back in the day. I wonder where I had all the energy. Of course I was a bit younger and more motivated then.  Now I am just trying to recover from all that’s happened in the past year and being patient with myself to get through it.

As I close this entry, I pray for continued strength to get through the remaining eight weeks. And from there, side effects will start to go away and things will start to normalize up.  I am hoping with all that is happening in the world with covid, that things will get better and get back to normal soon. 

It’s Been Gray in the Villa Household

With the rain coming down, the recent passing of Jason’s sister Lori, and Alyssa’s high fever which put her back in the hospital again, it has not been the best of days for us.

Being quarantined also has been hard. We have gone as far as car trip to the beach and brought some lunches to eat in the car while parked.

Looking over how 2020 has been, I am ready for it to fast forward. Alyssa has until July 31 when she is done with cancer treatments hopefully that is it.  Then she will spend the summer tutoring to catch up with her classmates.

It is going to be a hot summer so I imagine more days in the pool for Alyssa.  Please continue to pray for the Villa family with our trials and losses so far this year. We are a strong family but we still need prayers. This week in the hospital, Alyssa needed blood transfusions and have difficulty breathing. We don’t know what viral infection caused the fever but at least it wasn’t bacterial. 

Lord, we don’t know why you cause certain things to happen, you have your timing and reasons for everything. We just need to place our trust in you as we navigate this stormy weather.